My children have decided they don't want to be embarrassed by my rousing performance of Santa Baby at the church Christmas social.
I can't understand it!! I'm absolutely DELIGHTFUL in my feather boa and shimmy shoulders and mildy flirty come and trim my Christmas tree...
Granted, there have been certain uptight church members that have frowned and refused to clap or smile after my performance in years past. It's not like I ASKED to sing that song!!! I was just doing a public service as per the request of whatever musical person was in charge of the progressive dinner that year...
"I'll leave the room if you sing that song," said my newly teenage daughter yesterday. "I don't want to watch. It's too embarrassing."
My mother had this to say,
"You're getting too old to stand up there and be silly."
My father carefully suggested that perhaps Santa Baby was too sensual for the new leaf I have turned over.
"It may be a bit too sensual," he said. "It upsets the women...".
I am being forced to grow up against my will!
I had had plans to sing Santa Baby on my 95 birthday to my new decrepit friends at the nursing home in which I will live.
Come to think of it, by then no one will care WHAT I perform as long as I wear my depends dependably. I believe I WILL sing that song as a feisty old lady and cause an uproar with the wives of excited gentleman. Santa Baby gets 'em every time!
My kids have dodged a bullet.
I am searching for a new song to sing on December 3 at the church Christmas dinner. Something respectable and stately without being boring.
Tonight when I tucked Maya in bed with lots of kisses and hugs and a song she pulled me close and whispered,
"Sing Mary did you know, Mama. I like that one."
Hmmm. I'll take it under advisement.
