Friday, October 14, 2011

I Am Free Of Cumber.

Often as I am driving down the road on my elephant I pray.  I meditate.  I seek my True Self.  I notice the trees and the golden sunlight and the majesty of the mountains looming before me.

When I sense a deep Awareness within I sometimes begin to FREAK OUT!

I panic.  I DON'T BELONG HERE. Oh no!  What on God's Green earth am I doing on God's green earth?!

 oH MY GOSH!  i'M STUCK IN THIS BODY AND IT'S AGING AND i CAN'T STOP IT.  aND i'M TOTALLY IN HERE!  and THIS world isn't even REAL. It's not REAL at all.  It's pretend.  i'm being tested.  I don't like it.  It's ugly here!  Like billboards.  Billboards are hideous!  Cracks on the sidewalk are unattractive.  I broke my nail.  Ugly, fallible nail.

I'll bet things where I'm actually from run far more smoothly.  No weight gain, I bet.  Or starvation, for that matter.  No money issues... AAAAHHHHHHHH!

Then I have to take a deep breath...



It's okay Crys.  Joy in the Journey.  Sure, this life is full with pitfalls and quicksand.  But you are here to learn and be of service.  Settle down.

Today after just such a fit I turned to M. Catherine Thomas' Light in The Wilderness: Explorations in the Spiritual Life, as I always do in times of intense spiritual duress.

She quotes spiritual teacher, Don Miguel Ruiz in his The Four Agreements.
  Take a deep breath and feel the air as it fills your lungs.  Feel how the air is nothing but love.  Notice the connection between the air and the lungs, a connection of love.  Expand your lungs with air until your body has the need to expel that air. And then exhale and feel the pleasure again. Because when we fulfill any need of the human body, it gives us pleasure.  Just to breathe is enough for us to always be happy, to enjoy life.  Just to be alive is enough.  Feel the pleasure to be alive, the pleasure of the feeling of love.

Pleasure, you say kind sir?  Well, I do so enjoy PLEASURE!  

I'm TOTALLY gonna work on this whole breathing Love/Pleasure thing.  Can you IMAGINE?!  Being happy ALL THE TIME? Just cause we remember to breathe?  I'm a fan of the concept.

I tried it today.

I was pretty stinkin' happy!  All the day long I was content in my soul.  Quiet in there.

I took the kids to the zoo again.  We watched baby lion cubs and their mama.

Reminded me of my own wild cubs.

The Mama lion played and wrestled with her babies.

I played and wrestled with mine.

I reminded myself to breathe and Love.  I chose to radiate Love to all those around me.  I smiled and chatted with strangers.  Perhaps they feared my enthusiasm.  Some backed away slowly.  Others reached in their bags for pepper spray... just in case...  But I was HAPPY!

The grass made me smile.  (And not the kind you smoke either...)  The trees filled me with wonder.  A peacock made a weird noise.  I imitated the noise.  The peacock ran away.  I giggled like a loon.  I squealled with delight at the sight of the otters.  They played and swam forever.  Those otters are happy creatures!

I then taught my children to play volleyball.   I am a happy creature.

Another inspirational thought I feel impressed to share with ya'll is a quote by Deepak Chopra:

If you embrace the present moment, become one with it, merge with it,you will experience a fire, a glow, a sparkle of ecstasy throbbing in every living sentient being.  As you experience this exultation of spirit in everything that is alive, as you become intimate with it, joy will be born within you, and you will drop the burden and encumbrances of defensiveness, resentment, and hurtfulness.  Only then will you become lighthearted, carefree, joyous, and free.

I am living in the moment people!  I'm really doin' it!  And I must say I AM experiencing fire and sparkle and ecstasy and throbbing.  I like.

I feel free.

What are YOU happy about in this present moment?  Hmmm?