I went to a football high school football game on Friday night. I wanted to write funny stuff about it. I am being taken in different direction.
I wanted to write about how I know all about football now. I wanted to tell you that an "audible" is when you can clearly hear the french kissing of the teens in the bleachers several feet to your left whilst you eat your nachos and drink a beverage.
Instead of being Funny I am Aware.
I am Aware in the most surreal manner I do not belong in this body. Heavy. I know.
Do you ever have those moments? Where you are suddenly Aware of the Real You inside the Mortal You? Do you have the jarring realization of the temporary nature of the body?
I was Aware on Friday night as well.
I looked around that football game and saw cheering parents and smooching teens and dancing mascots and cheerleaders and I thought real loud at those folks,
"HEY! DO YOU PEOPLE KNOW THIS IS A TEST? YOU ARE NOT THE YOU YOU THINK YOU ARE! IT'S ALL A GAME!!!"
The People paid no heed to my telepathic message.
I remained acutely Aware. Of everything.
A breeze cooled my face. The smell of corn dogs, kettle corn and anticipation filled the air. The sweet chocolate of an M&M melted in my mouth (not in my hand). I watched a tiny blonde child carefully select a kernel of corn from a bag almost her height. She chewed and pointed to a drunken bat flying above us. I smiled. My husband kissed my lips after a touchdown. I heard him say he Loved me. Life coursed through my every cell. I was fully Aware.
I realize I often go through life dreaming of the future. Or dwelling in the past. But Life is Present. Life is Now. If I don't pay attention I will miss It. If I am not grateful for the details they are lost.
I go to high school football games every Friday night to support my friend. Tyson.
He is the football hero at his high school. Girls scream his name while he defends and offends. Guys slap his back (and butt, as male athletes are wont to do...). At 17 years of age he has the world at his fingertips. His peers look at him and see a leader. And he is.
Tyson the Football Hero. No autographs, please. |
When I look at Tyson I see a strong yet vulnerable man-child. He is searching for his place in the world. He is discovering who he truly Is.
I watch him on the field and notice he often glances up at his stern Polynesian father in the bleachers. Unsure. Looking for approval. Wanting to know if he is doing well. Searching for direction. Hoping his father is pleased.
He blows a kiss and waves to his Mama at half time before he jogs off the field with his buddies.
Tyson's Mama (Becky) and Me. |
After the game he runs, helmet in hand, two bleachers at a time, to his parents. He embraces them.
"Well done!" they say.
He hugs me next and thanks me for coming. His face is so grateful my heart aches a little.
This particular Friday I was Aware. Of the sweet, gentle spirit that resides in that enormous uniform wearing body of his. Of the Love that binds us all in this world. Of the drippy, stinky football sweat Tyson had transferred to my face and neck with his embrace.
I suppose as we fumble through life we look up as well, don't we? We look to our Father for support and Love. We want Him to be proud of us and give us direction. We desire to succeed in this Game of Life. We are Aware on the deepest level that He desires our success and happiness also.
When we have completed all the things we have been placed Here to do we hope to hear,
Well Done.
Happy Sunday Everyone. May we all win in this game of life and spiritually slap each other on the backside as a token of our friendship, support and Love (as athletes are wont to do...).