Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Cancer Tans and A Scorpion

Sydni and I worked on our Skin Cancer today by the pool.

We were very careful to put lots of sunscreeen on our faces and necks... WE DON'T WANT WRINKLES!

Then we baked. 

The recipe for a toasty, roasty tan is simply this:

Preheat Tucson to 116 degrees.
Lie on your back with a damp, white wife beater on your face until you can actually hear the sizzling of your own flesh.
Flip over onto your tummy until completely dehydrated and slightly dizzy.

Done!  Now you look extra sexy.

As we baked, I was like, "It sucks that I look so good with a tan!  I'm gonna get skin cancer FO SHO!"

"Yeah but you'll look really good in white this summer..." said Syd.

She makes a good point.

In other news I was frustrated about Something at 2 am this morning so I began to clean.  (My house is generally spotless due to my 2 am cleaning OCD issue...)

I bent down to pick up a popsicle stick left on the floor by one of my little monkeys when THIS little guy said, "Wazzzzup sista?!"  He wanted to shake my hand.

For a moment I thought, It would be PRETTY FREAKIN' COOL if I got strung by a scorpion! I could write about it and wake up everyone in the house with my screams.  Then everyone would feel sorry for me.  Maybe someone would even give me money and I could go shopping (when I recovered, of course.)
I reluctantly refrained from touching Mr.Scorpion.  Took his picture.  Then smashed him with a shoe.