Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Mexican Eyes (Feliz Cinco de Mayo)

Every man wants a Mexican woman for keeps.

Keeping a GOOD Mexican woman is the best and worst thing a man can do to himself. Men are completely hypnotized by the swinging of her juicy hips. They find her pride a challenge as she walks about with head held high and shoulders back. They love her effortless sexiness and warmth.

Silly men think they can tame a Mexican woman. They think she will quietly stay in the kitchen and deftly make fresh tortillas and then wildly stay in the bedroom and deftly make him feel like a MAN.

You are RIGHT, silly man. She WILL do those this. But she will also have her way. She will not roll over. She will not beg. She will treat you with respect and dignity. And she will DEMAND it in return. She is far too intelligent to be anybody’s little woman.

Do not piss her off too badly Senor or you may awake to find your favorite appendage missing.

A good Mexican woman can fly into the arms of her man or fly into a tremendous rage with little prior warning.

I can say these things without bragging too much. I’m the watered-down version. Blue Grass and front porch swings call to me just as loudly as Corridos and menudo.

But I’m not gonna lie. I think I’m pretty cool to have 50% Mexican blood. I love the fire that flows through my veins. I think I’m pretty cool because I speak Spanish and have Electric Hips. I think I’m pretty cool because I grew up surrounded by strong, intelligent Mexican women.

I also have THOSE EYES.

“Dicen que los ojos negros nunca enganan…” It is said that black eyes never lie…

My mouth has lied before. But my eyes have not. They can’t.

All the Mexican women in my life have THOSE EYES.

THOSE EYES that pull you in or stop you cold. THOSE EYES that need not say a word to be understood clearly.

Love cannot be hidden. Neither can Passion. Contempt. Anger. Jealousy. Devotion or the lack thereof.

A Mexican woman does not know how to feel things lightly.

A Mexican woman doesn’t bother with gossip. She would sooner grab you by the hair than waste her breath.

My sister was regularly slapped around by Little-Mexican-Women-In-Training that said, “I saw you looking at me!”

They were right. Her eyes couldn’t lie when she found them crass and unintelligent. She paid dearly for the honesty in her eyes. SLAP. SLAP. SLAP.

The Mexican women in my family are CONFIDANT and STUNNING!

My Tia Leticia has welcomed her first grandchild and still says, “Do you SEE how SEXY I am?!” Then she shakes her hips and dances in a circle for all to admire her endearing, silly, sexy display.

My Tia Vero left a message on my cell this week, “This is your beautiful Aunt Veronica…”…

My mother flexes her calves for me and says, “I have the most amazing, shapely legs…”…

Coral and I share a mirror and say, “I am SOOOO much PRETTIER than you!” Then we laugh, because it’s true…

Confidence is EVERYTHING!

A good Mexican woman never acts out of fear. She is driven by LOVE. PRIDE. PASSION. She will do ANYTHING for her family.

Story Time.

A good friend of mine still lives in Mexico. She is sexy and smart with an ample rear that never quits.

For years she watched her mujeriego husband acquire other lovers. She ironed his shirts every Saturday night knowing they would return home with lipstick on the collar and the stink of cheep perfume.

He would come home drunk and say, “No mi vida! Don’t get mad. They are only chapels but YOU are the CATHEDRAL.”

Sometimes he came home drunk and roughed her up physically. She once broken a kitchen chair over his head on such a night.

Sometimes he came home drunk and made love to her with fiery passion. She was always ready to accept what he offered.

Her eyes never lied when she looked at him with pain and love and loyalty and strength. She did not stay out of fear. She stayed out of Love. Love of her children. Love of family. Love of her dream to be whole.

She discovered a child running about town with her husband’s face that did not come from her womb. She accepted this truth with dignity. She cared for her family. She made fresh cheese daily from the cows she milked out in the yard. She washed his clothes by hand and she waited.

Despite her husband’s infidelity and roughness she never allowed another man to touch her. She is human and beautiful and pristine. Perhaps she was tempted but she has said, “Let God judge him for his sins. Let God search ME. I am clean.”

She waited for him to become the man she always knew he could be. They now have two grandchildren. He drinks his beer in the yard with his friends and winks at her when no one is looking. She adores him with her eyes. I’ve seen it recently. THOSE EYES simply cannot lie.

I’m not NEARLY the woman she is. She is the epitome of a GOOD Mexican woman. She may break a chair over his head to prove a point but she will not leave her little ones fatherless.

Huh. This was far more poetic than I had intended… Here’s another tidbit for ya…

If you got you A LIVE ONE with brown skin and a Barbie doll figure you best be careful. Keep her happy. Keep her satisfied. Keep her guessing. Boring is the GREATEST sin.

If you dare to love a Mexican woman be prepared for a wild ride.

These are my observations.

Feliz Cinco de Mayo!