Thursday, February 11, 2010

Kids @ Victoria's Secret

I bought myself these roses today just 'cause.  Red roses have always been my fave.  I needed them and they needed me.

With Valentine's Day just around the corner I found myself perusing the racy, lacy things at Victoria's Secret today.  I had to take my little ones.

First off I checked out the new collection of perfumes. I loved the new one that comes in a pink heart shaped bottle.  Smells like vanilla and somethin'.  Yummy.  Sweet but not too sweet, ya know?

Maya sprayed Tyson in the eye with the yummy, sweet perfume.

"Aaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh  MY EYE! I'M BLIND! I'M BLIND!"

"I'm sorry, Tyson, but now now your eye smells good!" said Maya.

I chuckled.  It was so Family Circle.

"Just cry, buddy,"  I said.  "The tears will wash out the sting."

Don't you wish that were true of life in general?  Just cry and the tears will wash out the sting...?  Crying just doesn't help in real life, does it?

So then I began checking out the... uhhh ahem.... night time appearal.  These are some of the things I heard from Thing 1 and Thing 2:

"Daddy won't like that AT ALL!  You can see right through it!"

"Won't you be COLD if you sleep in that?!"

"You should get a comfy sweatsuit for Valen-times Day."

"Mommy panties are WEIRD!  Which way is the front?!"

"That's not modest.  Its WAY too short!"

"I like the neon green one!"


Then Tyson proceeded to put an enormous purple bra on his head.  "Ha! Ha!  I'm a BOOB!"

It was the strangest bra I'd ever seen!  It had so much padding Tyson could wear it as a bike helmet and sustain absolutely no injury to the head in case of an accident.  WHO WEARS THOSE THINGS?

My kids had all the shop girls in stitches.

I had to argue with Maya about my selection.

"Mommy, you need to get THIS."

"No, honey, I'm getting THIS."

"But, Mommy, I like THIS better!"

I eventually stood my ground and got.... well... I got what I wanted.  (Believe it or not I DO have limits as to what I'll share with you.)  Suffice it to say I was pleased with my purchase. 

I just LOVE that store!  I always feel like I've stepped into a fanasty wonderland of fun.  I'll take one of each, please!

So here I am with my tell tale pink stripped bag.  Can you see what it says?  If you think it says Victoria's Secret you're mistaken.  What it ACTUALLY says is, 'YOU ARE A LUCKY MAN, MR. PISTOL.  HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!'. ;)

PS  Today was the first day I wore my silver liquid leggings out in public.  A group of older ladies actually gasped and could not avert their eyes.  An old man choked on his coffee.  My oldest daughter said, "I hate those pants. They're ugly."  Needless to say, I LOVE THEM! SUPAH STAHHHH!