Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Dear Coral,

Thanks for hanging out with me today. I had a great time. I'm glad your minor freeze-out is over and I'm no longer cut off from the presence of her majesty, Queen of the Emerald City. ? huh? (I'm making my stupid face.)

I appreciate that you took pictures of me in my new sequined M.C. Hammer pants. I plan to use the pics for a blog in the very near future.

I'm glad you're so hot 'cause if you weren't I would be TOE UP! My stock would plummet. As it is I find you a beneficial accessory... a nice addition to my little garden... So thanks for that. You're a great wing man. Need I remind you that I'm SOOOOOO much prettier than you?... :)

I'd also like to thank you for wearing a tiara to Target today at my request. It took some of the attention off my sparkly pants. (I love these pants. I look like a holiday. And we both know how I adore holidays.)

I hope that mop we picked out is sufficient for your needs.

Ross had some gonga deals today. You can get so much for so little. I like Ross. Remember that time he wore leather pants? Or when he had Marcel the monkey? Ross is my fave.

I know you're laughing your scrawny ass off at this letter. No one else would get it. (Don't worry. No one reads this blog but me anyway.)

I'm glad you and all your Buffalo peeps think I'm a good Christian and that I'll go to Heaven for sure. I'm not all judgey judgerson. I get you, girl. I love you very very very much.

I'll see you tomorrow for Turkey Day. I wouldn't miss it! (said in the voice of The Little Mermaid seagull.) This is this and that is that. Seagull?! You went up to surface again, didn't you? ....DADDY I LOVE HIM! Have you lost your senses completely? He's a human your a mermaid!!... I DON'T CARE...

Oh now I'm laughing out loud. Man, I crack myself up!!!



PS I only wrote this so I could put up the pics we took of us today.