I am sitting on my couch reading The Ultimate Southern Living Cookbook.
My husband is sitting next to me watching The Office. There is a pretty, evil office girl trying to entice Jim The Married. Jim is a happily married man.
That TV girl is very tricky. Like Satan. A lovely lovely Satan.
Satan IS very attractive, you know. Beautiful exterior. And I think he cross-dresses to fool happily married men. A happily married man would never be fooled by an ugly office co-worker. But he just may be fooled by a beautiful cross-dressing devil.
But I could care less about Jim right now. I've got bigger fish to fry.
"Ooooo, Babe! There is a recipe in here for cheesy yeast rolls. That sounds AMAZING! You add two cups of shredded cheddar right into the dough! And you use REAL BUTTER!!" I exclaim.
"Mmmm hmm," says he.
"UGH! Listen to THIS! There is a recipe for a CINNAMON LOAF! WITH YEAST! It calls for raisins and pecans. OH MY GOSH! YUMMY! OH BOY! HOT DOG!"
"Why are you reading that?"
"I need to make you some yeast bread. From scratch. You totally freaked this weekend when Coral made those yeast rolls. I can't have my little sister showing me up...".
He returns to his show.
"Get her out of there," he mutters with furled brows to Jim The Married TV Guy.
The Satan Office Jezebel has somehow weaseled her way into Jim's hotel room.
Whatever. Back to me.
"WOW! CHECK THIS OUT! THIS IS AMAZING! HONEY! LISTEN! This cookbook has a recipe for creamy RICE PUDDING! WITH RAISINS! You LOVE rice pudding! I'm totally making this sometime."
"K. ...Jim has really got to get that girl out of his room... He never should have let her in."
My husband is sweating bullets on behalf of Jim The Fictional Man Before Us.
"OH! OH! I FOUND FRIED OYSTER PO'BOYS IN HERE! YES! Ooooooo I am TOTALLY making these for you!"
I am beside myself. The possibilities are ENDLESS!
Mr. Pistol turns to me for the first time since Jim let the hussy in.
"Is that diet-porn for you? You sound pretty excited over there. Are you having a food-gasm? Should I leave you alone with that cookbook?"
I laugh and laugh. My man is soooo funny and clever.
He is jealous of my cookbook.
That's how I know he loves me.
PS He will want to kill me when he reads this in the morning...
I love you, baby! ;)
