I introduce the magic of the Sharpie Puppet Hand to my nephew, Josh. We are pals, he and I. Josh belongs to my sister, Michelle. But we share him. It takes a village, you know.
We must write on our fingers and palms when no one is looking because his father disapproves of Sharpie Personas indelibly drawn on his only son.
"When is enough going to be enough, Josh? I don't like you writing on your hands. I don't want you to think tattoos are okay. People that get tattoos are very sad. You can't wash away a tattoo...".
Josh's father stares me down with his peripheral vision. He is actually talking to me, I think. I pretend not to notice.
Josh runs away shouting, "It will come off in a couple of days if I take a good bath! Aunt Crystal SAID!"
Josh crawls under my desk and waits out the storm. He patiently awaits our weekly Emo Puppet Show.
"These are the faces of Everyman, Joshy," I say.
He is solemn as I draw faces on each of his tiny fingertips. There is Happy, Tall Man The Angry, Sad Guy, Pinky The Fearful and Fourth Finger The Confuse-ed.
Josh, being the passionate 4 year old he is, speaks through Tall Man The Angry.
"I'm so ANGRY!" exclaims Josh extending his middle finger at me in feigned rage. "I want to FIGHT YOU!"
I speak with Pinky The Fearful. I speak in the most high pitched Fearful voice I can muster.
"I'm Fearful, Josh! Anger makes me Fearful. I also fear Loss, Pain and Weight Gain. Please don't fight me. PLEASE!"
"I have to!" replies Tall Man The Angry. "Use your Angry finger, Aunt Crystal. So we can fight."
"But why are you SOOO Angry, Josh? Is it because we live in a fallen realm? Is it because of World Hunger and Injustice? Is it because children suffer daily all over the globe? Is it because ...Come to think of it... I'M GETTING PRETTY ANGRY TOO! I WANNA FIGHT SOMEONE!"
"Fight me! Fight me!" His miniature hand bobs about in excitement.
We interlock our middle fingers and wrestle. There is a great war between us. We battle until Tall Man The Angry is exhausted.
"I don't want to fight anymore," says Josh. Then he holds up Fourth Finger The Confuse-ed. "I'm just confused now, Aunt Crystal. I want some cold hot chocolate."
And so you see, within each of us exists the conflicting emotions of the Natural Man.
Anger is spurred by Fear. Anger feeds on the Angry.
Confusion ensues.
And when it's all said and done all a person really needs is to be Fed The Cold Hot Chocolate Of The Soul.
"
